back to basics

sometimes worship and praise erupt out of the joy you feel.
when there's that spontaneous song keeps ringin in your head... and there's this bright hope in your heart... cos you know that you know that God's on your side and nothing can keep you down.

then there are the times where the worship comes first and the joy comes later.

this worship is cos you know in your heart that you're redeemed, cos the work has been finished. even  if circumstances say otherwise. you worship cos you're grateful to have gotten this far even if you can't see the light at the other end. 

you make that choice to jump, to clap, to sing cos god is worth it.. even if that jump is weary and the clapping is halfhearted. and in the midst of tt praise... God floods in and all those cares are lifted off... and you find that joy again... and the song on your lips.

worship is wholehearted surrender.

it's term 2 week 6

i've been somewhat escapist these few days...

got a mountain of marking on my table... some ongoing projects at school, not enough time to settle them... cos i'm settling some fight between my kids half the time.

and yet i don't do anything when i'm at home.
and yet i don't think i'm at rest.

need to take hold of those thoughts and bask in Daddy God's presence again. i don't know how other people do it, but i really can't work when i'm feeling sian.

i had a random thought about whether cutting would relieve the pressure again. silly i know. it's not even my thought. go away devil shoo.

girlyness... hmm

i'm escaping the report book comments writing so i've decided to write on my blog instead haha.

been thinking about 'girl rights' recently... (cos i bought purple eyeliner on a whim lol.)

you know, the right to make the guys wait while you stare into the mirror in the toilet and fix your makeup/ hair.

i was just reminded of what a guy friend said to me once - that waiting is the guy's responsibility... and he'll wait for as long as the girl takes to makeup/do hair/ whatnot to look good.

i never knew that before!
i always thought that getting out of the house as fast as possible was the way to go. (as long as i was wearing something and my hair wasn't sticking out at a weird angle!) but i never really thought much about what he said until i started serving in choir and spending at least 30min on makeup on sunday mornings...
and so i'm just getting the revelation that God created all us girls to be beautiful - and we're meant to take care of our temple, make it look attractive as a part of what He has blessed us with.

i think being in the choir has grown me lots lol... from the uni days where the bros nicknamed me mgtg (more guy than guy)... to being onstage and being comfortable with makeup and all. funny how things go huh?

lil snippets of happiness

been staring at this lil bag...

can't help but feel blessed and loved that i'm remembered

yet it brings an incredible emoness at the same time cos i recall the days in London all at once and can't help but compare it to life now.

need to see/ feel/ hear/ live in that same kind of contentment again. but it's kinda difficult over here.. where discontent is the one emotion that people express openly. ah well. i guess remembering London makes the current 6 years of bondage feel more worth it =P