is a scary thing...
i guess in the same manner in which the israelites went into jericho and saw the giants together with the milk n honey and got frightened.
yesterday was team bonding... and i got a taste of what nie would be like - a myriad of people from different walks of life, about half of them twice my age, and expectations expectations expectations.
new season... new challenges... new growth. when i faced london with all my insecurities... it didnt quite feel this way, i was ready to move on, change my life. heh. i was excited... but now it feels like i'm contending with the old (still getting used to being back) as well as the new
i thought nie was gonna be... well... like uni... but meeting the people yesterday, the varying ages and varying degrees of enthusiasm... i'm terrified. and i've yet to find my personal motivation for being in nie/moe... much less be self-motivated and driven about all the 'must do's that are presented to me as requirements from the government. ugh. Lord may i never become apathetic to this position you've put me in.
i should say 'thank you Daddy God' and step in confident of the blessings... but right now i guess i'm just praying for lots and lots of favour and the ability to work with people putting aside any feelings i may have for/against them.
giants are my bread huh. think i need some new thought processes heh
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