i was planning the itinerary for the parents... who are coming to london today... and in the midst of it thinking - omg so expensive for all the tours and food and stuff.
then i realised (probably the holy spirit prompting lol.) suddenly... that money has been kinda governing my life in london.
let's not go out - very expensive
when treating people - omg... i can't believe i paid that much
when buying things for others - hmmm. lets see... 5 pounds will do...
but. is not my Daddy God my provider?
what is this spirit of poverty...
generosity is out of the fullness of the spirit - God has given me so much, so much is my portion as His heir... He is my provider, no matter what the circumstances say... and then you're able to spend, to give =)
[of course... don't be spendthrift as well la.]
i dunno which church to sow into still... so i haven't been tithing... but it will come =)
...
and who in the world have i been this term... going into lectures/ seminar group and being a mouse...
or simply talking to people and being serious... un-high, silent... un-me (or being the old me... as it were)
spirit of inferiority?
not good enough to be seen/ heard... not cool enough to be noticed...
malu la... no one will accept me if i'm siao.
or simply because i don't fit into the culture... i'll drink... have fun... but no i'm not going to go out clubbing/ partying (cos i'm too guai lol. and i don't enjoy it)... and therefore do not make as many friends, or have crazy stories to talk about... or have random topics of discussion.
but i've got God on my side...
isn't that more than enough support to be me?
hmm... i seem to have forgotten that.
life. this is it. =)
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