a love story

After all, if we were better women -- whatever that means -- life wouldn't be so hard. Right? ... We feel unseen, even by those who are closest to us. We feel unsought -- that no one has the passion or the courage to pursue us, to get past out messiness to find the woman deep inside. And we feel uncertain -- uncertain what it even means to be a woman; uncertain what it truly means to be feminine; uncertain if we are or ever will be. ... The message to the rest of us -- whether from a driven culture or a driven church -- is try harder.

--

Sometimes the idea of living as a hermit appeals to all of us. No demands, no needs, no pain, no disappointments. But that is because we have been hurt, are worn out. In our heart of hearts, that place where we are most ourselves, we don't want to run away for very long. Our lives were meant to be lived with others. ... We long to be an irreplaceable part of a shared adventure.

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The vows we make as children are very understandable -- and very, very damaging. They shut our hearts down. They are essentially a deep-seated agreement with the messages of our wounds. ...
And so, I made a vow. Somewhere in my young heart, without even knowing I was doing it or putting words to it, I vowed to protect myself by never causing pain, never requiring attention. My job in the family was to be invisible, to cause no waves. ... So I began to hide. I hid my needs, my desires, my very heart. I hid my true self. And when it was all too much, I hid in the closet.

--

Back off.

That's what I felt. No one said it; nothing they were doing implied it; it wasn't a voice in my head. Just a very strong impression. ...
I knew that, as a man, this wasn't my heart's true desire toward these women. I love them. I want to fight for them. I have many times.

Back off, or, Leave her alone, or, You don't really want to go there -- she'll be too much for you is something Satan has set against every woman from the day of her birth. it's the emotional and spiritual equivalent of leaving a little girl by the side of the road to die. And to every woman he has whispered, You are alone, or, When they see who you really are, you will be alone, or, No one will ever truly come for you.

--

The essence of a man is Strength. A man is meant to be the incarnation-- our experience in human form -- of our Warrior God. A God who comes through for us. ...

To experience the strength of a man is to have him speak on our behalf. For when men abuse with words, we are pierced. Their strength has wounded us. When they are silent, we are starved. They have offered no strength; they have abandoned us. But when they speak with us, hear us, offer their words to us and on our behalf, something in our hearts is able to rest.

--

The young man understands something of the journey of the heart. He wants to talk, to "share the journey." The woman is so grateful to pursued, she opens up. They share the intimacies of their lives -- their wounds, their walks with God. But he never commits. He enjoys her.. then leaves. And she wonders, What did I do wrong? She failed to see his passivity. He really did not ever commit or offer assurances that he would.

--

To have a woman friend is to relax into another soul and be welcomed in all that you are and all that you are not. To know that as a woman you are not alone. ...
When God gives a friend, he is entrusting us with the care of another's heart. It is a chance to mother and to sister, to be a Life giver, to help someone else become the woman she was created to be, to walk alongside her and call her deep heart forth.

--

Women warriors are strong, yes, and they are also tender. There is mercy in them. There is vulnerability. In fact, offering a tender vulnerability can only be done by an incredibly strong woman, a woman rooted in Christ Jesus who knows whose she is and therefore who she is. Offering our hearts wisely, living in the freedom of God's love, inviting others to rest, alluring those in our lives to the heart of God, and responding to the heart of God in worship are some of the most powerful ways that a woman wars for her world. But she also puts on the full armour of God daily and takes her immovable stand against the powers of darkness.

--

Anna came to the ball prepared. She was beautiful in a striking gown that shimmered like starlight. She spent hours getting herself ready -- her hair, her dress, her heart. As they reach the dance floor, Anna expresses her fear of dancing with the King before the eyes of others. "We wouldn't want to end up in a heap," she says. His answer to her questioning heart? "I am King. I will lead."

Jesus is extending his hand to you. He is inviting you to dance with him. ...
His gaze is fixed on you. He is captivated by your beauty. He is smiling. He cares nothign of the opinion of others. He is standing. He will lead. He waits for your reponse.

Captivating - unveiling the mystery of a woman's soul
John & Stasi Eldredge


-romanced by the King of kings-